I miss moment

I miss moments. If you notice its in plural form. I have had lots of I miss moments. At the moment some of them would be when I watch those programs which shows strong bond of brotherhood, sisterhood or friendship. Now that everyone is everywhere it’s hard not to miss them. Someone had actually mentioned this to me “ Bila jauh bau wangi, bila dekat bau busuk”. Meaning: there is always something that we are not happy about that person when we are near. But we'll always remember the best thing about them when we are far from each other.

Another time was after I arrived back in Malaysia from Brisbane. Life in Brisbane was very different. I only had to worry only about myself and my study. That was all. So, I was ‘free’er to go anywhere I wanted to. If I want to go out at 6 am to Botanical Garden no one would stop me but me. If I would like get a ride on the CityCat, I could simply go without worrying about anyone stopping me. I did not have to seek permission from anyone. I could go on my own if I wanted to.

My sisters had played a big part in my life in the last three years. I would not say it was easy. It was not. Living alone is much easier because I only have to think about myself. But I’m bored to death. Haha. I only have the four walls and the idiot box to entertain me. However, very often we are not satisfied with what we have. I should be grateful to have this house to myself. I can do anything I want. Well, there are pros and cons.

Back to the main topic…

Things will always improve in the fourth month. This is because by this time I’ll have so much to think of that I’ll forget about the things I missed. No doubt leaving the things we like and love is part of tarbiyyah Allah gives us to make us a stronger and better person. Allah is trying to teach me to manage my emotions well.

I am one person who loves to rack my brains for the great memories I used to have. In a way it makes me happy. On the other hand it makes me sad too. It has both parts of the coins.

Nevertheless, i think it’s good to let the memories on loose strings. They will come back to me once in a blue moon each time I walk on a path of life which I could somehow relate to something dear to my heart. Let them loose and gain new ones. They may not be as sweet or bitter as the ones that I used to have in the past. But hey life goes on. It does not stop each time I travel back in memory. Still, the past memories will also be my guidance as I am treading on the new path. That’s why they are priceless.

Furthermore, I believe that nothing happen for no reason. How good or bad they look like there must be something that I can learn from them. For an instance, the boisterous 3B which has been entrusted into my hands. I don’t know what Allah has set for me. All I know is that I have to go through this no matter how hard it is. There is no way I can reverse to another road. It’s either I crawled on this path or I have I find my way out in any way I can. It’s not easy to keep on being optimist when you know that half the class is not learning. The other half are busy disrupting the class and every teacher in the staffroom know that you cannot control that class. I complain too much about them. Sometimes I am afraid that all I do is complaining.

There go my ramblings about memories. Wassalam.